Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Yeh!

Welcome back to the RAC blog! Your one-stop-shop for on-the-road auto-care do-it-yourself pick-me-ups.  Nah. I’m only kidding, fella! This RAC is the Revolutionary Army of Crackers. Your one-stop-shop for …er….a load of made-up shit. Never mind! Now you’re here we might as well make the best of it. Anyway my shit is better than your gold. Truth.

 

What I try to do, now on a monthly basis apparently, is to convey, (usually unsuccessfully) that while this may look like a nonsensical ramblings of a mad person or a sarcastic idiot taking the piss of who-knows-what ineptly, this is actually a wonderful gift from an entity whose dimensions you have not yet built the machines to measure. In fact it will be machines built by machines that will able to achieve this and you only really be able to understand what they present to you in your meta-form where you exist as a unitary-organism outside the confines of your individual physical lives and concerns. Don’t worry, it’ll come and be much more satisfying than you’re imagining. The analogy I like to use is of the mushrooms on the lawn whose relationship seems to be that of one between autonomous entities whereas in fact they are merely manifestations of a single almost entirely subterranean organism. The trouble is that I’m very old, a bit confused and a very much  reduced version of the meta-entity I’m ultimately part of, so I forget of what use to us that analogy is supposed to be. All I do know is that in the analogy I’m supposed to be a different type of mushroom altogether. Or maybe I’ve just taken too many mushrooms. That sounds likely. It definitely involves mushrooms.  Hmmmm mushrooms! I’m hungry now.

 

Another type of mushroom is of course, Michael Portillo who’s obviously got all cocky since I mentioned him last month and has started shooting his mouth off about Europe. Maybe he figures he’s got nothing to lose now I’ve unmasked him as an alien visitor and that he might as well take whatever the city boys are offering to help normalise the idea of pulling UKOGBANI out of le EU before it gets round to regulate their highly profitable fun and games. Maybe him, Lawson, Healy et al are right and we’ll lose the goose that lays the golden eggs but to me, the European project is not just noble but necessary in the evolution of how human society is organised despite its very visible shortcomings. I propose that a voluntary federation of democratic states able to operate as a single unit when circumstances demand is the only model worth following. Sovereignty and identity are lost as a result of economic forces that are inevitable so long as there is a consensus in the world of the rightness of free-market capitalism which for the moment is successfully holding. Democracy on a trans-national scale is perhaps the only tool that can preserve any degree of sovereignty and identity in self-defining communities despite the widespread perception that the opposite is so. I do not see The European Union as looking to or having succeeded in any way in abolishing cultures and identities in even its core nations. Nor do I hear Germans bemoaning working-time directives or health and safety legislation etc as we are so often told here on our island our leaders of wealth constantly do. Naturally one is always concerned to prevent a concentration of power at the centre but in the electronic capitalism of early 21^st century Earth, the whole concept of power is not always easy to nail down. Power exists in mass-culture and flows onto the streets and through the politics and back into the money and into sex and into death and into the future. Er yeh…it’s poetry innit. Basically it isn’t just some guy in a uniform telling you not to do that or else. Human choices make the world. I want you to….I WANT YOU TO SENSE YOUR OWN STRENGTH!

As I say, I might be totally wrong. I’m not that brilliant at reading what you pretty Monkeyforms are apt to doing though I always love finding out through your many various news outlets. It’s like an exciting on-going planetary soap-opera. Some idiot psychologist said on the radio recently that it’s much better for one’s mental health to avoid the news altogether. Well that’s all very well but what if he’d started off showing off his Jim’ll Fix-It badge or something? He must have wondered what those wars were about if he heard about them at all. He’ll certainly wonder what’s going on when my followers take control of his civilisation and begin erecting an enormous statue of a pink cartoon dog-thing with nice ears for all to venerate as only I do today. Lovely Crackers! Bounce back to us, little Crackers! You are forsaken no more!

 

 OK let’s link you to somewhere better. First of all there's this if you want the end of the penultimate paragraph to to make any sense. You have to listen to till the end or maybe just the end if you're not a fan of early 80s pacifist-anarchist punk. Fight war not wars you barbarians! So sad. We end as it began with the fab-four (or was it the pre-fab four?) playing us out with one of their other hits than the one that gave me the title for this incredible and audacious post.